Sanctuary: you

Thursday, November 23, 2006

you

you write like yesterday and create perfect mirror images. you talk like tomorrow with perfectly proved theories. i quietly read, and i quietly listen. and somewhere in all my paying attention to you, this present that i've stepped into, i'm trying to find out what i'm capable of.

everything has slowed down now, for a while it has been this way.

so far i've come up with zilch.

me, myself and i are heading for a brick wall and i'm doing nothing about it.

i've never wanted to be this way, last year i knew i'd be different. i even wrote about it, so here i stand a little more happy, a little more confused, a little more scared. things have changed and it's a little unnerving sometimes. for the many people who say 'i think too much' - yes i do. force of habit, a miserable force of habit on my part. i feel awkward apologizing for it.

today is thanksgiving and it's cold and i feel like this is the first time i'm experiencing winter here. in denial i am, in denial i shall remain - just for a while i promise. i was going to write happy thoughts about cold feet that went to watch 'happy feet' (for the love of God i walked from 92nd street to 69th in the bloody rain and my shoes-socks-feet got wet. please remind me next time not to be so naujawan and try this again). and how on my way out of the theatre i walked a block to the train station because it was too hard to walk all the way back, too rainy, too cold and i wasn't dressed right for this icy reception (feet were numb and that's a sad way to go). down in the dark and dampness of the subway station the little sister and i found ourselves trying to tap dance, our own little version of happy feet. without the snow, in the subway but with the cold.

i have places to show you, remind me to write them down so that i don't forget them. they are places from where you see the sunset, the park, the dancing lights and ordinary people of every wrapper walk by. they are the trains we must ride where my thoughts are at their most original. they are songs that must be walked to and made memories with, buildings that must be deciphered. they are pictures that must be taken. there is alot to be done.

there is alot that must be known. and i guess you've known that all along, and i love you with all my heart for it.

natasha took a picture at 3:03 PM | walking around in circles (2)

2 Comments:

Are you bald yet? (Fine, this is the last time I ask. =P)

By The Surreptitious Fabric, 11/24/2006 7:39 AM

*SCREAMS* SHUT UP!!!!!
hahahahaha
sadly no, but i'm working on it.

By Natasha, 11/24/2006 7:55 AM

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Thursday, November 23, 2006

you

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